I don't own a scale for a variety of reasons, expensive, most of my house has carpeting or slightly un-leveled floors, and it is depressing. OK, mostly because it is depressing. I believe I am around 130 over weight. It is to the point where I am reluctant to go to the doctor because I do not want to know what I weigh. I also am annoyed by why they bother. No one ever makes a remark about my weight. It seems like a mindless routine that is performed that happens to be embarrassing to me. I saw a preview for a movie where this heavy woman was asked if she was wearing a bathing suit bottom. Her stomach fat hung over so much from the front view the bottom half of the swim suit was hidden. It was suppose to be funny - I guess to some. However I cringed with pain, because that is what I would look like in a two piece swimsuit. Definitely not funny. People can be so cruel.
Today I felt a slight soreness overall - not bad, but I feel tired. I did 12 swings with a 15 pounder, 10 swings on each arm, 10 cross over lifts on each arm and some stretching. That was all I felt I could do. I am feeling optimistic. I will do some more later in the evening. I am impatiently waiting for the point where I don't feel so wussy and can do several set of reps.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Introduction
I am soon to be 54 and I feel assaulted by life and I am very fat. How did I get this way? It happened so gradually that it surprised me when I realized there was a problem, I feel helpless. It was part depression. It was part being overwhelmed by life. It was part a life style that had me basically sitting and sleeping for years. I like food, but I do not believe it was a significant factor. I remember when I was a teen meeting a mother of a friend. She was enormously fat and had a huge straw basket of candy bars by her chair. She ate three of them during the hour that I was visiting. I had the impression that you had to be like that to be fat. It was something you had to work at. So I did not feel that I deserved to be fat and it was part of the mind games that I played with myself. I work at an aerospace company. I spend all day in meetings and staring at a computer. I frequently take work home putting in up to 15 hours of work a day. I get very little sleep, frequently only 4 hours worth. The time I have at home for myself, I spend cleaning or TV watching. I have been doing this for years.
Why the depression - the short version is my daughter had a cocaine problem, spent thousands - over hundred thousand - trying to address the circumstances that situation introduced, lost all my money - at least all disposable income, my husband lives in another state, there is a real possibility I will lose my home, my daughter is still a mess, her boyfriend was just put in jail for meth, she is on probation for mushrooms, my son seems incapable of doing most things and I fear he will never be self supporting. Kind of a mess.
Everyone has problems. However, this blog is about getting myself into physical shape and putting focus back on me. In researching answers to my husband's back problems I stumbled across kettle bells. They look like fun and seem to have a reputation for strengthening the core and thus helping back problems and promoting weight loss. I like that I can easily do the exercises in small increments, the equipment does not take much room and from the information I gathered should help a persistent hip problem I have. I have extremely tight hip muscles and frequently a nerve get pinched and I limp.
I have spent hour on the Internet looking into kettle bells and I am excited. My husband and I went to a certified kettle bell trainer and he showed us a few moves. I am sure we were a daunting pair for him. I imagine he usually get a much more buff clientele. He spent most of time showing us a system of movements that supposedly releases energy to help the body heal itself. We really cannot afford to be regular clients, but I do intend to go back to him.
I have tried some of the movements with a 10 lb dumbbell and a 15 pounder. I have a tendency to throw myself into something and then get hurt so this has been a challenge. I read on a blog about a 10,000 swing challenge. The person was considered upping her daily routine of 300 swings. I thought that was a normal threshold, so I should be able to do 100 swings. I could only do 20 and my heart was racing! This is definitely going to be a very gradual process. The second day I did 30. Today I have done 60 over the course of the day. It is easy to do 20 swings in the morning, 20 when I get home from work and another 20 later in the evening. I will try to just keep on increasing. On day three, my butt feels like it has been massaged. It is hard to explain, but it feels good. I do have a problem with a stiff neck, but I might have slept wrong. The muscles around my shoulder blades feel a little sore and there some soreness down my back and in my shoulders, but not to bad. I do not feel any soreness in my midsection and I wonder if I am giving it enough of a workout? I dream of being a before and after picture.
Why the depression - the short version is my daughter had a cocaine problem, spent thousands - over hundred thousand - trying to address the circumstances that situation introduced, lost all my money - at least all disposable income, my husband lives in another state, there is a real possibility I will lose my home, my daughter is still a mess, her boyfriend was just put in jail for meth, she is on probation for mushrooms, my son seems incapable of doing most things and I fear he will never be self supporting. Kind of a mess.
Everyone has problems. However, this blog is about getting myself into physical shape and putting focus back on me. In researching answers to my husband's back problems I stumbled across kettle bells. They look like fun and seem to have a reputation for strengthening the core and thus helping back problems and promoting weight loss. I like that I can easily do the exercises in small increments, the equipment does not take much room and from the information I gathered should help a persistent hip problem I have. I have extremely tight hip muscles and frequently a nerve get pinched and I limp.
I have spent hour on the Internet looking into kettle bells and I am excited. My husband and I went to a certified kettle bell trainer and he showed us a few moves. I am sure we were a daunting pair for him. I imagine he usually get a much more buff clientele. He spent most of time showing us a system of movements that supposedly releases energy to help the body heal itself. We really cannot afford to be regular clients, but I do intend to go back to him.
I have tried some of the movements with a 10 lb dumbbell and a 15 pounder. I have a tendency to throw myself into something and then get hurt so this has been a challenge. I read on a blog about a 10,000 swing challenge. The person was considered upping her daily routine of 300 swings. I thought that was a normal threshold, so I should be able to do 100 swings. I could only do 20 and my heart was racing! This is definitely going to be a very gradual process. The second day I did 30. Today I have done 60 over the course of the day. It is easy to do 20 swings in the morning, 20 when I get home from work and another 20 later in the evening. I will try to just keep on increasing. On day three, my butt feels like it has been massaged. It is hard to explain, but it feels good. I do have a problem with a stiff neck, but I might have slept wrong. The muscles around my shoulder blades feel a little sore and there some soreness down my back and in my shoulders, but not to bad. I do not feel any soreness in my midsection and I wonder if I am giving it enough of a workout? I dream of being a before and after picture.
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